I Am Not a Slut PDF Ü I Am Epub / Not a PDF

I Am Not a Slut ☃ [PDF / Epub] ☂ I Am Not a Slut By Leora Tanenbaum ✑ – Natus-physiotherapy.co.uk The author of the groundbreaking work Slut explores the phenomenon of slut shaming in the age of sexting tweeting and “liking” She shows that the sexual double standard is dangerous than ever befo The author of the groundbreaking work Not a PDF ✓ Slut explores the phenomenon of slut shaming in the age of sexting tweeting and I Am Epub / “liking” She shows that the sexual double standard is dangerous than ever before and offers advice to—and offers wisdom and strategies Am Not a PDF ☆ for alleviating its destructive effects on young women’s livesYoung women are encouraged to express themselves sexually Yet when they do they are derided as “sluts” Caught in a double bind of mixed sexual messages young women are confused To fulfill the contradictory roles of being sexy but not slutty they create an “experienced” identity on social media even if they are not sexually active—while ironically referring to themselves and their friends as “sluts” But this strategy can become a weapon used against young women in the hands of peers who circulate rumors and innuendo—elevating age old slut shaming to deadly levels with suicide among bullied teenage girls becoming increasingly common Now Leora Tanenbaum revisits her influential work on sexual stereotyping to offer fresh insight into the digital and face to face worlds contemporary young women inhabit She shares her new research involving interviews with a wide range of teenage girls and young women from a variety of backgrounds as well as parents educators and academics Tanenbaum analyzes the coping mechanisms young women currently use and points them in a new direction to eradicate slut shaming for good.

10 thoughts on “I Am Not a Slut

  1. Julie Ehlers Julie Ehlers says:

    This is a well written original readable smart insightful interesting useful deeply depressing book about how social media and cell phones have completely wrecked relations between young men and women If you're a parent or have a guiding influence in a child's life you really should read this book so you know what they're up against and how you can help themI took away two main lessons from this book The first is that we need to do a better job of raising boys to respect girls and women I think a lot of us just assume this will happen on its own but clearly for a lot of boys it does not The forces of the mainstream media not to mention pornography which oddly is not discussed here are apparently too strong for many boys to overcome without some kind of countervailing influenceThe second lesson is that we need to do a better job of raising girls to stand up for themselves and for what they truly want There are just way too many stories in here of girls and young women doing things they don't want to do date someone text a naked pic of themselves to someone sleep with someone drink too much at parties because they want to be popular or get a particular guy to like them This is not to say these girls are then responsible for the subseuent slut shaming or worse that occurs of course I don't believe that and Tanenbaum doesn't either but it IS to say that girls and young women really need to learn to exercise sexual agency and that clearly is not going to happen on its own eitherAnd for god's sake both boys AND girls need to be taught to stand up for other kids rather than look the other way or join in when someone is being slut shamed or assaulted Their parents need to remind them that high school and college are going to end and they'll never have to see any of those people again if they don't want to but they're always going to have to live with themselvesI wish I could say I'm optimistic about this but these sorts of books always leave me pessimistic than ever The scope of the problem is huge and raising awareness is such an insanely daunting task There are obviously no easy answers but this book at least asks most of the right uestions

  2. Lori L (She Treads Softly) Lori L (She Treads Softly) says:

    I Am Not a Slut Slut Shaming in the Age of the Internet by Leora Tanenbaum is a highly recommended examination of the meaning of slut for young women todayYoung women today face a contradictory landscape While they can be encourage to explore their sexuality they can also be humiliated and disgraced based on the same actions or no actions at all but simply at the discretion of others Currently the word “slut” has a dual meaning and can either be used as a positive creating a sense of esprit de corps between friends or it is a negative harmful label that can cause pain well into adulthood Tanenbaum explores the meaning of slut in adolescent and college age women and why the usage of the word is increasingTanenbaum's book includes interviews with many young women Their stories and experiences are the examples used to document her points She also examines and distinguishes between the negative acts of slut bashing and slut shaming Slut bashing is verbal harassment where a girl is intentionally targeted because she does not adhere to feminine norms Slut shaming on the other hand is a casual and often indirect form of judgment Adding to this already volatile mix is the wide variety of social media outlets that can be used to harass and bully often anonymouslyWomen face the ongoing problem that female body parts are regarded as offensive female sexual activity is mocked as a competitive sport for guys or preyed upon as an opportunity for coercion and even young girls are reduced to sexual playthings It's easy to understand why young women might internalize their own objectification Tanenbaum makes an argument that 'Slut' is best regarded as a toxic four letter word that should be uarantined if not buried She makes it clear that we can sharpen awareness that 'slut' is a violent label; when females are called sluts sexual assault and self assault all too often lurk nearby But first there is an important distinction to make here it’s not female sexuality that is dangerous but the sexual double standard I think most women have seen many examples over their lifetime where men have become accustomed to treating women as sexual objects and worthless “sluts”This is an empowering examination of what the problem is behind the increased use of the word slut and how we can address the societal issues while helping and encouraging young women today Clearly anyone who currently has any contact with teenage or college age women knows that the all too common use of the word slut needs to be addressed and some encouragement to reassess the use of the word would be beneficial Since these young women use social media constantly Tanenbaum points out that it could be used as a tool for positive change in contrast to the negative we so often hear aboutTanenbaum does an excellent job explaining the problem with many examples and offers some suggested solutions The book includes in the appendices Do's and Don'ts for Parents of Teenagers and College Age Children; The Slut Shaming Self Defense Toolkit; and a list of ResourcesTable of ContentsIntroductionWhat’s the Same What’s DifferentAre You a “Good Slut” or a “Bad Slut”?Slut Bashing Face to Face and in CyberspaceReciprocal Slut Shaming Sexual Identity in an Online World“Good Slut” Containment Strategies“Bad Slut” Coping MechanismsThe Rape of a “Slut” Is RapeCan “Slut” Be Reclaimed?Creative Solutions to Eliminate “Slut”Appendix A Do's and Don'ts for Parents of Teenagers and College Age ChildrenAppendix B The Slut Shaming Self Defense ToolkitAppendix C ResourcesAcknowledgments notesDisclosure My Kindle edition was courtesy of HarperCollins for review purposes

  3. Kelly Kelly says:

    A really thoughtful and thought provoking exploration of the word slut and the meanings ascribed to it I don't agree with everything Tanenbaum posits a few things I think she overthinks and over academicizes to the point where she herself shames girls for how they appear but for the most part her arguments are solid and worthwhile I found her discussion of how reclaiming the word slut is not a goal we should strive for at this moment particularly noteworthy and worthwhile It was also refreshing to read views and context from non white women in the text too especially in regards to the notion of reclaiming and owning the word slut

  4. Stephanie Stephanie says:

    Let me start off this review by saying that I am 100% against calling somebody a slut in any form of bullying or shaming I had a lot of frustration while reading this book I found it very hard to relate to the stories of the girls and I found the focus on the word slut to be a little misguided This book is mostly a bunch of stories about girls who have their feelings hurt because they broke social taboo usually not bc they wanted to but as the author claims because they were pressured by boys girls social mediaetc It was really hard for me to relate I have always defined myself and my identity as somebody who is strong outspoken and who does not give in to outside pressure I have convictions about my beliefs and about my way of life regardless of what other people have to say Most of the stories were about girls who gave into peer pressure or who were very insecure And while I feel pity for them I don't really empathize I feel like there are many stupid things that young girls and boys do in high school To say that it has ruined your life or has drastically affected you sexually and emotionally is a little dramatic I feel that men and women need to be accountable for their own actions and shouldn't blame others because of their own bad decisions Yes there is a double standard Yes there is sexual ineuality Yes as females we should not let men dictate why we wear certain clothes and why we decide to have sex with them but many girls do Many girls end up marrying dick bags who emotionally psychologically and physically abuse them and they still stay with them It's hard for me to empathize with these types of women Have a backbone Stand up for yourselfShe refers to girls who are labeled sluts as girls who have asserted their agency And because they are so powerful they get the label of slut There is no accountability for their actions or their ethics I think she is overreaching Teenage girls make dumb decisions That has nothing to do with agency or control or good self esteem They are impulsive just like their idiotic male counterparts I think we need to empower young girls to know their own minds and their own bodies and to only put their desires to action when they feel certain that it is with someone they can trust Even as a 28 year old I only want to be close to somebody who I know will keep our interactions private And that's because my life is nobody's fucking business That is what we should be teaching girls Privacy rights Not to cry because they got called a nameThere is so much blame being pushed around Girls are feeling bad because of the pictures in magazines Girls are doing bad things because of their reality star role models Girls are doing things that end up hurting themselves because they don't want to be a prude Because they want the boy to like them Because they want their girl friends to like them Because they want everybody to like them But they're not doing things because they want to do them and somehow that everybody else's fault It's the fault of the media The fault of Madonna and Beyoncé So now every catty or petty thing that one girl does to another is suddenly blamed on social media? How about we say that most teenage boys and girls are a bunch of little shits in regards to each other And hopefully they grow out of that Yes we should correct their behavior and try to help them not be little brats but having them not be accountable for their own actions isn't going to help anythingTanembaum wants me to believe that when my best friend jokingly says hey slut or you're such a whore that she's doing it to make herself feel better While I don't doubt there are girls like that out there I don't believe this is universal and it shouldn't be declared as such I think she is over reaching with the word slut I feel like instead of focusing on the label of the word slut We should focus on raising strong and independent girls Girls who are not afraid to say no Girls who don't care how many likes they get on Facebook or Instagram Girls who don't dress because it's going to suit to male gaze Girls who stand up for one another and for themselves We cannot blame society's double standard on the word slut The word is just a product of the double standard Instead of focusing on a word we should be trying to raise better boys and girls There were a few statements I liked in the book One wasIt's true that one of feminism central goals is sexual empowerment but this can only be achieved within a context of sexual euality Within the culture of slut shaming and the sexual double standard sexually uality does not exist and young females efforts to subvert the system are turned against themThe best line in the whole book wasn't even Tanenbaum's but on of the girls she interviewedBeing raped is being abused by a man Being called a slut is being abused by a womanThere are also many stories that I think negate responsibility of the girl involved For exampleAn excerpt from the book after a story about a girl who started having sex at 13 and got preggo at 18 and had an abortionGabriella believed that she became pregnant because of having been labeled a slut She says I wasn't aware of it then but now I know that the label does matter Young women need to be educated about the whole slut thing so that they won't think about themselves the way I didMy opinion bullshit She bcm pregnant bc she was selfish and ignorant She was not properly educated about sexual health and safety and that's why she got pregnant Not bc someone called her a slut It's ancedotes like this that really makes me hate this book and the idea that Tanenbaum is perpetuating the idea that young girls and women have no accountability for their actions It's all the fault of a sexual double standard I don't think the word is to blame Bullying is to blame Cliues are to blame Peer pressure is to blame Sexual ineuality is to blame The double standard is to blame Bad parents are to blame Weak willed boys and girls are to blame But it's not all because of the word slut The word is just a tool used to beat down a girl's self esteem and humiliate her No we absolutely should never call a girl who has been sexually active or assaulted a slut We should teach our kids to stand up for others when they witness bullying We should teach our kids not to use that word slut But we can't blame a person's choice to be promiscuous alcoholic or to abuse drugs an a label I believe firmly in choice and willpower We need to teach girls to be strongI will say this parents and young teen boys and girls should read this book And I mean young like read it to your 11yo I can see how this would be extremely helpful for young teens to read It would share with them experiences and suffering from other teenage kids It would hopefully make a boy think twice before pressure a girl into sex and then talking shit about her afterwards And hopefully it will make a girl think twice about sending Nudie Judies to the cute boy in algebra

  5. Andrew Andrew says:

    The title intrigued me The first bit was worryingly slow Then the Foucauldian analysis of power began I haven't read such a lucid real world application of Foucault's ideas sincewellsince ever I thinkAnd from there Leora Tanenbaum held my attention Her feminism isn't the happy warrior feminism I normally prefer but it doesn't matter Her writing is good the personal stories she uses illustrative her theoretical explanations solid and her cause righteous This is an exposé of the still prevalent sexual double standard that stands at the root of so many problems Particularly in this book the definition use and dangers of the word slut I Am Not A Slut is an eye opener into the distressingly fragile world of the generations behind us Social and self policing of reputations is omnipresent; reputations are threatened; and these threats uickly morph into real sometimes deadly conseuencesWomen live this world so being enmeshed in it should read the book to understand the whole structure Men should read this book because they're likely totally oblivious to this world And fathers they should just read the book because

  6. Amanda Amanda says:

    I ask Samantha if the rape or the “slut” reputation in the wake of the rape is the cause of her distress “It’s both It’s the two events together But they are also separate Being raped is being abused by a man Being called a slut is being abused by a woman” Welcome to the 21th century where women are called sluts by strangers on the internet I Am Not a Slut is Tanenbaum's follow up on her book Slut She compares how slut shaming and slut bashing has changed over the yearsThis book is part anecdotes part facts To be honest the best parts are the stories from women Tanenbaum interviewed for this book They are honest raw and painful They express how many women feel today especially in the Western World Most anything worth uoting are things these women said and many of those uotes hit hard They are without a doubt the best part of the bookTanenbaum while a competent writer misses the mark with this book though First and foremost while the title suggest it will focus on how slut shaming is carried out on the internet there's little in the actual book regarding this topic Her conclusion is simplified that being a young woman is comparable to being in Orwell's 1984; with help of smartphones women can be photographed at any moment and they act after this fact It's a simple explanation and is drawn with little hard facts to back it up In fact the author relies too much on anecdotes for her conclusions I don't doubt a single one of the interviewed women but their stories are stories and you can't base scientific conclusions on stories To make conclusions you need to be able to back up stories with studies and in this regard the author failed to do so

  7. LynnDee (LynnDee& LynnDee (LynnDee& says:

    While the book got a little repetitive and almost preachy and self promoting a little bit the points being made were excellent 1 Stop calling girlswomen sluts even in jest The word slut is not a good word and can never really be used as such until2 Eliminate the sexual double standard If a guy can have sex with random girls and be celebrated for it then why can't girls do the same?3 STOP FUCKING VICTIM BLAMING Instead of saying girls shouldn't drink too much wear revealing clothing etc if they don't want to get raped TEACH BOYSMEN NOT TO FUCKING RAPE GIRLSWOMEN 4 WOMEN ARE SEXUAL CREATURES AND THIS IS A GOOD THING Instead of shaming women for having sexual desire or only valuing them if they are virgins how about you appreciate us for the majestic fucking beings that we are? 5 Ladies we need to be kinder to each other Like Tina Fey says in Mean Girls when girls call each other names it just makes it ok for guys to do the same So let's stop competing with and shaming each other and celebrate each other instead I would definitely suggest that everyone read this

  8. Dusty Summerford (Reviews by Reds) Dusty Summerford (Reviews by Reds) says:

    I received this book through Goodreads First reads giveawayThis book got me to thinking a lot about what we put out on social media She has some really good points in this book I think all young women should read this book

  9. Melissa Melissa says:

    Tanenbaum poignantly argues for the complete elimination of the word slut by deftly documenting how this hurtful word has negatively affected young girls and women in our social media frenzied world Tanenbaum argues that with the increasingly rapid use of social media along with access to smart phones and texting especially among teens the landscape for how girls and women are viewed by society and how they are perceived by their peers and “friends” has made the label of slut even damaging and virulent I Am Not a Slut is an essential contribution to the ever growing dialogue of feminism slut shaming and rape culture

  10. Jessica Jeffers Jessica Jeffers says:

    By the time that I got a uarter of the way through this the thought crossed my mind that maybe Mean Girls coherently addressed slut shaming She makes some good points about the sexual double standards that women face every day it's some really fucked up shit we deal with I just don't think she presented and defended her arguments particularly well

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