Date onomics eBook Ê Kindle Edition

  • Kindle Edition
  • 224 pages
  • Date onomics
  • Jon Birger
  • English
  • 21 March 2016

10 thoughts on “Date onomics

  1. Leslie Leslie says:

    From the Time magazine article based on this book I thought it would largely be about marriage markets; when I saw it on the shelf at the library I picked it up partly because I was curious how someone could write an entire popular press book about the fact that marriage markets exist and are sometimes imbalancedI guess to the extent that I had a specific idea of how that would work I hoped that this book would use the marriage market concept to interrogate the cultural idea of marriage as a necessary structuring element of adult and especially adult female life My ideal world version of this book would be a love letter to women that says that no not everyone can win the marriage game but it is a game and maybe knowing that and understanding why and thinking about what else women have done throughout history besides get married for it is a 1950's fantasy that all women have always gotten married will be helpful to some women who expected their lives to look different than they have turned out toProbably if I had noticed it was written by a man before I got home with it I would have guessed that this was not the direction it was going to goTo me the system is rigged so here's how you can make sure you're one of the winners is a compassionless and sad message but that's exactly the one this book tries to go with Ladies lock a man down in college or move to a market with a higher ratio of men to women This is only one of its problems; the issue that was even difficult for me to handle was the relentless use of bad social science research to push a reductionist gender essentialist message In the world of this book Human behavior can be explained by the behavior of non human animals As someone whose work involves culture in a pretty big way I vehemently disagree with this notion although of course there are whole disciplines that try to make it work I don't know man We aren't birds Men change their behavior drastically based on perceived sex ratios while women pretty much sit there looking pretty Unsurprisingly both a high MF ratio and a low one somehow end up being bad for women High patriarchy but at least no one will rape you because men Protect Their Scarce Resources; low YOU'LL DIE ALONE Career Spinster After some sad hookups No indication is given of how these sex ratios are detected in order to influence behavior especially when they are not real population phenomena but only imbalances in the subset of the population you'd theoretically be interested in marrying andor banging This seems like a pretty big hole to me but hey I'm not a cognitive scientist Gay people do exist but only to the extent that they make life harder for straight women but bisexual people definitely don't Non binary people don't Poly people don't Nor do women who don't want to get married really Most egregiously in my opinion the lives and experiences of the non college educated which is 75% of the adult population of the US are given almost no attention in this book Yes the man drought is a college educated man drought but given that the situation is reversed for the less educated I was uite surprised that this fact was not exploited to check up on some of the book's claims For example a low MF ratio contributes to rape Then shouldn't less educated women experience less sexual violence than educated women? Hmm the data doesn't bear that out A low MF ratio causes marriage rates to drop Then shouldn't marriage rates have dropped a lot less among less educated women? Weird the data doesn't bear that out either Never mind now I get why the author ignored the less educatedAnyway this rant has gone on long enough but suffice it to say that if you read this book and were frustrated by it you're not alone and it's not very good and you should probably forget about the whole thing And if you want to talk about the high rate of non marriage among women in early modern Europe you can come sit by me

  2. Michelle Llewellyn Michelle Llewellyn says:

    All the Single Divorced? Ladies Read This BookJon Birger finally validates what I've always known since I was a freshman at my local southern Utah college Fall 1993 surrounded by females taking our Gen Eds askingWhere are all the boys? The majority of my Friday and Saturday nights were spent studying in an apartment complex where over half the units were occupied by single women I also had a part time job Attending my LDS Mormon Sunday worship services was also frustrating wondering how I could possibly compete for a date with 150 other young women all with an eye single to our eternal salvation Hitting each other over the head with our trays of freshly baked cookies to impress the handful of single guys entice them to come hang out at our apartment was also not uncommon Back off b ch he's MINE was a silent message telegraphed among females at mixers Thousands of women know exactly what I'm talking aboutTemple marriage in the Mormon community is exactly like a game of musical chairs As all the good active educated return missionaries make their selections from the huge pool of eligible bachelorettes those still left in the circle are not only suffering from the humiliation of never being chosen but slapped with the blame that it was our own fault for not making ourselves marketableThe appendixes at the end were fascinating Birger lists state by state and county by county the dating market numbers of college age women and men The two listed for Utah are Salt Lake and Utah counties home to the two largest universities University of Utah and BYU I found it very interesting that among the 22 29 age group millennials the number of college educated women in Provo totaled 14000 as opposed to only 7482 MENWhy is it taking so long for young men in Utah county to graduate?I can't help but wonder if Birger's numbers include divorced men and women which makes Birger's numbers even MORE skewed as most never married Mormon women aren't looking for a man with baggage not to mention the alimony which would reuire us to continue working outside the home; not exactly the ideal life we were taught to strive for The man deficit is realMy roommates and I were not promiscuous but we spent many nights sitting around discussing our options wondering if we shouldn't just lower our standards like so many of our desperate friends were doing just to get a guy to notice them The numbers here in Utah have always been skewed against never married women where the only male dominated place to meet anyone is the line at Best Buy for the newest X BoxUnfortunately too many of my amazing single never married friends and I would rather be doing grown up activities like focusing on our careers and character building hobbies than waiting for these blue collar men to grow up stop playing the field and settle down Yes Chapter 6 was especially fun to read and the author got it exactly rightIn the end the only solution Birger suggests is doing to encourage our young boys to be ambitious go to school and graduateNow we just need to convince them to stop cohabitating and put a ring on itThat goes for the women too

  3. Margo Margo says:

    Let me know if you want to borrow this book from me This was one of the best books on dating I have read in a long time It focuses primarily on the statistics and data around dating demographics and it really opened my eyes to something I had never thought of before There is a chapter that specifically looks at the Mormon demographics and addresses the gender ratios in Utah county which after reading this book have completely convinced me that I should not move back to Utah unless I intend to get a boob job and regular botox injections Pretty sure I am going to move to Wyoming now and marry a cowboy Fabulous book well worth the read for singles females and males for that matter college educated or not

  4. Daniel Daniel says:

    This is the best book about explaining dating and marriage relationships Not some sociocultural theory suggested by some professors but on numbers The same thing happens in animals Simply put when there are men than women men fight for the women and settle early Men also work harder to earn such as China and ancient Athens When there are women than men men sleep around and become reluctant to settle down Women then work harder and asked for rights such as amongst certain colleges Orthodox Jews Mormons female graduates in big cities and the Spartans The solution? These are all controversial1 Graduate women ‘lower their expectations’ and pair with non graduate men2 When choosing college be mindful of the gender ratio3 Graduate women move to places where there are graduate men4 Delay school starting age for boys because boys mature slowly5 Graduate women be ‘decisive’ and give ultimatum to their boyfriend as that has been shown to actually increase marriage rate The author observed also that women who are still single after 30 are attractive and successful but men who are still single after 30 may not be so This really needs to be backed up from studies A very interesting book but sure not to go down well with a lot of people

  5. Guilherme Zeitounlian Guilherme Zeitounlian says:

    This book is very short and it shares a simple message demographics and gender ratios matter a lot when predicting mating behavior in human populationsOh that was dry Let's try againThe author says there are way college educated women than men in the US and so the marriage market is skewed Men don't want to settle and women find it hard to marryBirger argues that especially in cities like New York it is increasingly difficult for college educated women to marry college educated men He uses data from census and interviews with matchmakers and women who have it all but can't find a manThe solution? Relocate to areas like Silicon Valley with its overabundance of males or marry an uneducated man Also consider gender ratios when choosing your collegeThis is the gist of the book it also tells some curious cases about the marriage crisis in orthodox jews and Mormon communities but that is about itThe interviews and uotes seem VERY cherry picked but it is an interesting read nonetheless

  6. Lori Lynn Lori Lynn says:

    Date onomics is an eye opener Whether you are a single person still searching for “the one” a parent of a student nearing college age a divorced person re entering the dating market or a college admissions officer this book will provide insights that will help you think clearly about the dynamics of dating behaviors As the number of women with college degrees continues to increase in comparison to men with similar educational levels we need to consider the impact of that shift on our society Jon Birger offers observations that many of us have never noticed but that are particularly significant for young adults in the United States The book is cleanly written and presents economic and social data in an accessible way along with savvy commentary Birger is not writing to pass judgment; instead his book helps people understand their own choices better including where they attend college where they live what profession they pursue and who they find attractive

  7. Lauren Flores Lauren Flores says:

    As a single Latter day Saint woman and a former Utah county resident this book was SO validating There’s a saying among residents that “Provo kills love” and after reading this book I’m realizing that there is great truth to that statementThis book is a very uick read and I can’t recommend it enough to Latter day Saint YSAs or others who can’t understand the complexities of millennial dating within the churchI shared so much of what I learned from this book with friends Not sure how this book will influence my dating pursuits but I am definitely pondering some deep thoughts over here Read Read Read

  8. Arielle Arielle says:

    This book made me sad than books that are actually sad

  9. Ashley Ashley says:

    Jon presents the facts well but as someone of faith this book was rather depressing It serves as a reminder of how in American culture women are viewed as objects of pleasure that can easily be used and thrown away so men can easily move on to the multitude of other women willing to do whatever it takes to keep men interested in them It makes me sad that this our normal women who are afraid of being alone and who find their worth in men resulting in low standards and women who give their bodies and hearts away to men who give them no commitment and men who think they need to take advantage of women to be men we were created for so much than this

  10. Christine Christine says:

    I loved this book for its different perspective on the dating world As a single woman in the New York City area I was starting to wonder if it was me After reading this I realized that there are a lot other issues going on that have little to do with meThe imbalance of the sexes is a really interesting phenomenon and has a lot of different causes and results For someone looking to get married will get some tools for improving their odds in ways most don't think of

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Date onomics✅ [PDF / Epub] ☉ Date onomics By Jon Birger ⚣ – It’s not that he’s just not that into you—it’s that there aren’t enough of him And the numbers prove it Using a combination of demographics statistics game theory and number crunching Date o It’s not that he’s just not that into you—it’s that there aren’t enough of him And the numbers prove it Using a combination of demographics statistics game theory and number crunching Date onomics tells what every single college educated heterosexual looking for a partner woman needs to know The “man deficit” is real It’s a fascinating if sobering read with two critical takeaways One it’s not you Two knowledge is power so here’s what to do about it      The shortage of college educated men is not just a big city phenomenon frustrating women in New York and LA Among young college grads there are four eligible women for every three men nationwide This uneual ratio explains not only why it’s so hard to find a date but a host of social issues from the college hookup culture to the reason Salt Lake City is becoming the breast implant capital of America Then there’s the math that says that a woman’s good looks can keep men from approaching her—particularly if they feel the odds aren’t in their favor Fortunately there are also solutions what college to attend any with strong sciences or math where to hang out in New York try a fireman’s bar where to live Colorado Seattle “Man” Jose and why never to shy away from giving an ultimatum  .