My Secret Life PDF ½ My Secret PDF/EPUB or

My Secret Life [Reading] ➿ My Secret Life Author Henry Spencer Ashbee – Natus-physiotherapy.co.uk 'My Secret Life' is perhaps the most infamous of all underground Victorian erotica It is the sexual memoir of a well to do gentleman who began at an early age to keep a diary of his erotic behavior He 'My Secret Life' is perhaps the most infamous of all underground Victorian erotica It is the sexual memoir of a well to do gentleman who began at an early age to keep a diary of his erotic behavior He continues this record for over years creating in the process a uniue social psychological document Authorship of the book is mysterious Henry Spencer Ashbee a book collector writer bibliographer notable for his particular focus on sexuality is suspected by some to be My Secret PDF/EPUB or Walter He is very likely the compiler of the book's index the provider of some editorial assistance the person who saw the text into printGershon Legman was st to link Walter Ashbee in Legman's introduction to the reprints of Ashbee's bibliographies The Grove Press edition of 'My Secret Life' included an expanded version of that essayMore recently however Ian Gibson's 'The Erotomaniac The Secret Life of Henry Spencer Ashbee' ISBN provides a detailed review of circumstantial evidence arguing that Ashbee wrote 'My Secret Life' presumably weaving fantasy anecdotes from friends in with his own real life experiences Just prior to this in May Channel UK broadcast a documentary 'Walter The Secret Life of a Victorian Pornographer' which also claimed that Ashbee was Walter.


10 thoughts on “My Secret Life

  1. Matt Matt says:

    Don’t judge meI have a very good reason for reading this excessively graphic insistently perverse Victorian era sex memoir I’m researching you see for this ah for this book I’m writing about mid 19th century London scullery maids Or something Let us be honest with each other We all know why I read Anonymous’ My Secret Life The reason is simple Because it’s there I am the Mallory of prurient interest and this is my Everest I can still sense you judging me Alas this is who I am I read a lot of books Books on the Civil War On World War I and II Biographies about presidents Biographies about generals But every once in awhile I feel the need to read something bawdy And so we arrive at this place My wife took it rather well The look on her face when I added this to my bookshelf was pretty amazing I didn't know a person could have so many conflicted feelings reflected on their face simultaneously To her credit she didn't say a thing Just pulled out the ol’ pre printed divorce forms and made a few updates Eventually she also came up with a list of ground rules for reading My Secret Life To wit I was not allowed to read it in public including the patio where people might see I wasn’t allowed to bring it to work lest I lose my job I couldn’t read it in our bedroom or in my office or in the kids’ rooms or in any room the kids ever entered or in the kitchen where food was prepared I also couldn’t read it in the bathroom unless I was simultaneously taking an ice cold shower Or alone Or in the presence of our children I was not allowed to read this while sitting or laying down I finished this standing in our front hall The last thing you need – or want – is a sex lecture from me But I think we can all agree on a natural law that people have always engaged in sexual activity And they’ve liked it For long stretches of human history this reality has been cleverly hidden by various scolds and inuisitors Yet it has always been there From pornographic cave art and the Kama Sutra to the whalebone dildos of Nantucket housewives and patent machines sold to alleviate a woman’s “hysteria” there has always been a sexually charged undercurrent to life on Earth In the history of sex the Victorian Era has always been held up as a time of high moral dudgeon a subdued period of restrained language conservative dress and oh so proper behavior This is a generality of course and generalities are always wrong in the specifics which My Secret Life aptly proves This book originally came from an eleven volume opus totaling 4000 or so pages It is important to note – so that you don’t get a LifeLock alert every time I enter your neighborhood – that I did not read anywhere near 4000 pages My Secret Life is firmly in the public domain meaning that there are a lot of versions to read Through Kindle you can even get the whole eleven volumes though I will definitely form an unfavorable mental picture of you if you do The print version I read was slapped together by some internet publisher and put onto 324 pages sized 11x85 The editing is horrible The grammar and spelling errors rampant It is impossible for me to know whether this is the fault of Anonymous you can go to Wikipedia to read the debate as to the author’s true identity – I’m in no position to say whether this is a good use of your time or not or the fault of the “publisher” It is also therefore impossible for me to know what was excised The version I read answers a philosophical uestion I have long pondered Why do pornographic films bother with plots The answer surprisingly is that sex can get boring Somewhere on the space time continuum my fourteen year old self is shaking his head in disbelief You need some sort of moral context for sexual activity or else it becomes this primitive mechanical act that is initially attention grabbing but eventually meaningless This fundamental truth has long been known to smut purveyors which is why there are so many libidinous aliens and horny copy machine repairmen floating through XXX movies For the most part my edition of My Secret Life is nothing than a list of graphically described sexual conuests At first I was okay with this The author whoever he is is a provocateur and he certainly got my attention It takes a lot to shock me and he succeeded At the start of this memoir you find the author hidden beneath the privy staring up at women who are going to the bathroom Disgusted already? He’s just warming up You will follow him as he purchases prostitute after prostitute often using his last farthing You will read about every farmer’s daughter and scullery maid he ever seduced Every conuest of his life is told in rather graphic detail utilizing his own very uniue lexicon of euphemisms One of the indicators that this might be a true account rather than an epic of Victorian erotica is that the narrator never attempts to place himself in a positive light This is not an irresistible specimen of manhood having his way with an endless procession of beautiful damsels uite the contrary most of his action is purchased and since he is often nearly broke there is a lot of begging involved Also since he does not like to use French letters he gets the clap You have to read this stuff to believe it Take this excerpt for instance EXPLICIT CONTENT DELETEDOr this section EXPLICIT CONTENT DELETEDIt turns out there is not a single thing that is suitable to uote Eventually shock gives way to tedium with brief moments of reprehensibility Whoever the author was he seems a mostly terrible person The only interlude in which he approaches humanity is in his affair with a maid with whom he appears truly in love This portion of My Secret Life is just about the only palatable one Again I’m not a moralist but without any emotional framework this guy is just a junkie looking to score his next hitSince My Secret Life at least the version I read is mostly disembodied sex you don’t learn a whole lot about the author or his friends He claims to be keeping them anonymous At one point he mentions some buddies who went off to fight in Crimea which gives us a time point If you look closely enough though you will find interesting details about Victorian life However this takes a bit of suinting and getting this just for some Victorian flavor is akin to the way men used to read Playboy for the articles This is a book that you probably shouldn’t read There are other books deserving of your time Actually literally every other book that has ever been written is probably deserving of your time Every book Of course that’s the very reason I got this in the first place So act accordingly


  2. Michelle Michelle says:

    Popsugar challenge 2020 A banned bookThis isn't just a book it's a project and at 1969 pages probably the biggest book project I'll ever take on I started this back in January and therefore its taken me 6 months to get through so it's really hard to review as there's a lot that hasn't stuck in my mindThere was no middle ground for me with this book either I was loving it or absolutely hating on itThis is the secret life of Walter his memoir which he left with a friend to be released after his death Walter is a sex addict and this is his diary of his sexual experiences from an early age through his teens and into much later life during the Victorian eraIf you are thinking of taking this book on just beware this focuses purely on Walter's sex life he doesn't write about popping to the shops etc etc each chapter is his memory of a particular sexual experience I love a book like this but almost 2000 pages on sex felt like wading through treacle at times This book is problematic in today's society not being around in the Victorian era myself I've no idea how his adventures would have been perceived then but certainly now he would have been locked up for some of his experiences My favourite part of this book were the volumes featuring Sarah a prostitute who was with Walter for many years and I just adored their relationship The sexual journey they encouraged in each other the mental hurdles they overcome I felt this was the period of time when Walter really stepped outside his comfort zone and grew as a sexual being After Sarah I felt he really leap from that platform and threw caution to the wind Walter for me is going to be extremely memorable his adoration of vaginas is incredible there are whole chapters dedicated to the finest details of the vaginas he had seen and his love of them His frankness of STI's was really interesting to read about in many ways I feel society has gone backwards in the topics we tiptoe around and the shame we carry if we have experienced them Walter had his fair share of STI's and no shame or bravado radiated from him he was very grounded and factual in his handling of them There's so many things to talk about with regards to this book but as a side note I am currently listening to The Happy Vagina podcasts on Spotify which centres around women's sexuality their body's orgasms and I really feel that this is something Walter would have championed I don't think there's a man who walked the planet that worshipped the vagina the way he did and all these centuries on we are still not talking to females about masturbation or encouraging self exploration In many ways the world needs Walter's not in all ways as he encouraged everyone he encountered in his secret life to explore their limits I found a lot of humour in his expressions revving his engine his love pole the love trap uncunting in these 2000 pages the C word is probably used around 4000 times however it is used in the way it was originally intended to name a few The experimentations with feet shillings and peas will always make me laugh along with some of the women he met along his journey Mollie Amelia Sarah Helen and the Great Eastern To sum up if you enjoy Marues De Sade but feel it's a shame that people generally die after their orgasm then Walter is your man Three stars


  3. Flora Flora says:

    You will read few books as bizarre as this one It's the multi volume memoir of an anonymous Victorian gentleman recounting his prodigious sexual exploits with a bewildering variety of partners ranging from whores to little girls to young men to aristocratic ladies and the weird thing is it's way too weird to be firmly shelved on the Victorian Porn shelf a la The Pearl It's too compulsive too fixated on inconseuential detail to be serving the principally utilitarian interests of the genre It's also too self involved to be truly pornographic there's humor here but it's minimal The book was originally printed by a private European publisher and the printing was extremely small a handful of copies and somehow one of them ended up about thirty years ago in the hands of Grove Press Theories abound as to the identity of the author but it's the anonymity of the author that's the key to its nature as an archive of experience a collection of worldly encounters that matter mainly in their enumeration This is autobiography as mathematics


  4. Robin Robin says:

    Sort of hard to form an opinion of this book On one hand it it is at first disturbing because the writer begins with recollections of being abused as a child and then moves on to his harassing exploiting raping purchasing and seducing women At times he seems almost delusional in his belief that every woman wants it so i suspect that some of what he believes are seductions are really not as consenting as he thinks On the other hand here is a rare insight into the sexual psychology of the Victorian man and also some of unsavory particulars of the time Bathroom habits and lack of undergarments for one thing access to abortions for another I wrote a paper on gender and sexual anxieties as portrayed in Victorian fiction and that was how i heard about this book and I wish I would have had this for that paper It's fascinating to watch the narrator as he cycles through immature to worldly powerful to powerless confident to sheepish and lewd to ashamedThere are some issues with knowing how much we can trust this narrator but important than the truth of each incident I think is getting a glimpse at the way language and desires are put together I have lost track of all the slang and nicknames for body parts and functions It is always interesting to see that the things we assumed were so repressed at this time had multiple descriptive phrases Something about his accumulators rogering to frig a wench's motte with his pego??? So randyBasically if you are looking for a sexy sexy book this might disappoint you Every page has sex and bawdy talk but some of it is sort of depressing andor morally sickening I don't mean that in a depraved acts sort of way but that for me it was hard to read these true stories about Walter's mistreatment of so many of these girls and servants and yet at times I also felt sorry for him His beliefs about his body and illness and his overpowering need for women are honest and almost pitiful i wish i could know about his non secret lifeTo sum up my review This is a gold mine for anyone researching Victorian literature sexual psychology or sociology But if you're looking for a jolly good time this won't hit the right note with everyone


  5. Catalina Catalina says:

    Boy is this really happening in the Victorian era? I remember so well reading Sense and Sensibility and waiting for the bloody kiss to happenbut noooo you can't have that in a Victorian novel; while the reality was actually so bloody obscene DSo this novel was interesting first for putting into light the 'underground' sexual life of women and men in the very puritan Victorian era and second as a step in the erotica evolution from Life of an Amorous Manwhere explicit descriptions were close to zero to Anais Nin's beautiful sensual images or if you want to the amazing sexual fantasy of Pauline RéageI admired very much the author philosophy which should be applied even by some modern persons therefore i'll use it to conclude Many who have not experienced our pleasures consider them bestial But the various bodily functions such as eating drinking urinating copulating are their eually bestial? No they consider them uite natural to which all indulge And then so are the erotic games that a man and a woman conceive everything is permitted if they do it for their mutual pleasure The uncouth the dull that consider women only as a mass of meat with a hole which did not fancy which are unable to conceive sexual pleasures which copulate only when the excess of semen makes the cock eager they are precisely the bestial ones because their behavior is very similar to that of animals The couple blessed with imagination who can conceive games unknown to animals rises the intercourse to a spiritual height makes it a dream of the senses does of lust and love a poetic ethereal celestial delirium


  6. Laura E. Hall Laura E. Hall says:

    This is one of the bawdiest books I've ever read and if anyone ever tries to tell you the Victorians were uptight about sex point them at this volume It offers an unparalleled glimpse into Victorian sexuality from everything to social attitudes toward the female body generally and unsurprisingly they're there for male consumption sexual awakening and exploration not always consensual relationships between the monied class and their domestics prostitution by choice and by chance birth control and abortion and underwear and toilet habitsBeing a diary it can be tedious in places where the author recounts multiple events in extreme sometimes monotonous detail But the author is also self deprecating and achingly human throughout much of the volume It's fascinating to read about something discussed so little during the actual period and in the author's own words


  7. Lee Rene Lee Rene says:

    I can't really rate this book as an enjoyable read but My Secret Life is invaluable for anyone interested in Victoriana The voluminous work details the exploits of a bounder who rarely looks for sexual partners from his own social class but instead rapes and pillages the vaginas and other orifaces of poor girls maids sailors and street prostitues with joyous abandon My Secret Life is 19th Century social history than erotica Emotions are rarely involved the sex often brutal the author's contempt for those from the lower classes and women as a whole at all times palpable


  8. Margot Note Margot Note says:

    I could write oodles on this book All I can say here is that it’s worth a read even though Walter’s exploits can be repetitive Then blammo he tries something new to satisfy his curiosityFoucauldian “will to knowledge” To think that this was abridged from 11 journals worth of materials PS Let’s bring back the term “gamahuching”


  9. Sandy Sandy says:

    Finally My secret life is not such a secret any I know it all If you haven’t read it it’s perfectly fine You can jolly well do without it in your life I was so exited to start it and I swear the words I said just before staring it was “ah let’s read some Victorian soft porn” Alas I was mistaken there was nothing soft about it It was horrendous outrageous and as raw as it can get Basically this can be named as the “19th century porn hub for readers” The 11 volumes were a journey Thankfully Mr Dominic Crawford Collins decided to release the first 4 volumes as audio books which was absolutely hilarious What a joy it was to listen to him I listened to it while working out cooking going to work etc I finished the other 6 volumes by reading one chapter a day; not necessarily sticking to it though not spending a day with ‘Walter’ felt right on some days spending a bit time than usual with him felt right some days and I just sucked it up and thrashed the last 20% during the last two days If I finished it in one go I would’ve seriously uestioned my sanity Finally after 145 days I parted with Walter I didn’t know whether to like it or to despise it I don’t know what to think of it It’s utter chaos and I don’t think Walter will ever leave my memories It’s a fucking diary of 1969 pages with elaborated encounters that amounts to thousands simply because the guy thought he should write down his leisure time activities for the reference of future generations Fancy that By far it’s the most outrageous book I’ve ever read in my life Even the number of pages sounds perversive Walter wrote a clean cut memoir of his adventures Basically he was THE most active sexual predator in Europe at the time he went on conducting his activities in and out of London the countryside of England France Italy Germany Netherlands Switzerland Turkey Denmark and few other countries he hasn’t mentioned directly Talking about the nationalities of the women he had or less painted uite a big potion of the world map in a transparent white His rampage was just unbelievable I lost count of his Bessies Kitty’s Camiles Charlottes Sarah’s Nells and and and Basically he was the master of the game No one was safe around him I mean no one; Cousins servants chamber maids washer women neighbors unhappy wives young widows peasant girls unknown females whom he happened to meet in travels factory girls the ‘working girls on the streets’ and It didn’t really matter where either Stairs dining rooms lounges parlors bedrooms boundary walls hay bales attics barns fields cemeteries abandoned houses hotel rooms violently rocking ships even the church The man had talent He knew every single Public House in London knew almost all the ‘working girls’ in the area The guy was on a mission and he accomplished it with flying colors And he did it as a prominent gentleman in the London upper class and as the king of seduction The funny thing was he never saw anything wrong if he had to force himself on someone He always thought the women ‘wanted it’ He always thought he’s doing both the parties a favor when he forced himself on many women he had the pleasure of conducting business with I couldn’t really understand his mindset when he genuinely had that thought embedded in his brain all the bloody time he was just looking for an opportunity to empty his bollocks A peculiar guy indeed but I won’t call him a rapist no that’s not Walter On the other hand the women in this book aren’t the saints uite a big number of them were ready to lose their skirts in a jiffy for a penny wine a luncheon or just for the pure pleasure of few hours of drillingNow Walter was a character I would not want to meet in my life Still he struck me as a tragedy created by many events and social norms He was sexually abused by his governess as a very young boy coming from a dysfunctional family bullied and humiliated at school because of certain features of his privates was pushed to find out everything about sexuality on his own with another bunch of eually eager kids Unfortunately from a peeping Tom he grew up to be the son of the mistress any servant wouldn’t want to have Then Walter was pushed into a loveless miserable marriage The posh Victorian settings of separate bed chambers must’ve added fuel to the fire He hardly had any contact with the wife always out and just like all the upper class gentlemen in that era he didn’t have to work for a living Even when he was broke he had enough to live by So What does he do? He acuires his duties as a full time satyriasist He was clearly a sex addict and There was no help no shrinks to talk to the guy goes on doing what he thinks is the best He himself admits how uneasy he felt if he went on without ‘getting any’ for than two days What is that if not a serious addiction? If he lived today things would’ve been different He may have ended up behind bars or in a psychiatric hospital getting help for his addiction most likely the latter He also showed very less emotions His thoughts always generated from one part of his body and I assure you that is NOT his brain There were lot of blunders where he thought he was in love but there were two instances I felt some genuine feelings He wrote about his servant Mary with pure passion and pain I thought “bloody hell? This guy is actually capable of emotions other than what’s felt on his crotch” Second time with an unnamed female whom he swears he will love and cherish as long as long as he live He made an honest attempt to keep his doodle for this woman for 15 months which got him totally cranky even if he seriously loved her From these I realized it’s not his incapability of love or mental attachment for one partner it’s purely his need of variety and inability to stick to one person physically When he tried he got depressed He was genuinely having a very advanced state of hypersexuality I almost felt sorry for him sometimesHowever even if it was all a bit too much I learnt a lot about the practices in mid 1800s in England These things you will never find out by reading Dickens Their habits clothing hygiene even some terms I never even dreamt of The main focus which is copulating had their limitations Many performances that are widespread in today’s society were NO NO in Walters time or done by the French Walter was fiercely British at least in his early days The ladies dressed so lavishly with layers and layers of clothes pretty gowns and gloves and bonnets and what not But they never knew anything about undergarments Drawers were used by a tiny fraction and almost everyone went about with some extra ventilation But they referred to themselves as highly civilized individuals This book also has a section that talks about alleys and gutters on roadside which were used to conduct the bodily functions of men women alike regardless of their ‘class’ A well dressed woman suatting on alleys performing necessary acts was uite alright Their personal hygiene was next to none The rooms had washing stands and chamber pots cos they had no notion about a concept called ‘running water’ or even a bucket they stood in a bed room and rubbed their bodies with a damp cloth Why couldn’t they just fill a barrel and have a bloody bath like normal people? Disgusting I’ve also came across some phrases I honestly had to google with the highest possible number keywords available The results astonished me There were many phrases and words that doesn’t exists in Oxford dictionary any but I’d rather not mention them here just to be on the safe side The book does have its educative aspectI wrote too much Before I shut up I must write about ankles oh my goodness how I laughed So basically seeing a naked ankle of a woman can be referred to as seeing a topless woman or a guy who forgot his boxers in today’s context It gets better and goes in phases Phase 1 seeing the naked ankle gets the Molton lava boiling Phase 2 seeing a woman’s naked leg below the knees lays the passage for the lava to transmit Phase 3 seeing a woman’s naked leg just 2 inches above the knee can set off Vesuvius all over again In plain terms an ankle in 1800s was an instrument which could put a gentleman in a very compromising situation when it comes to his breeches I practically rolled on the floor and broke into a laughing fit reading that Bob Dylan was right when he said Times they are a changinBloody hell this seems to be the longest review I’ve ever done Seems fitting though 2020 Popsugar challenge A book with a pink coverBook #42 of classics challengeBook 51 of 2020


  10. Takipsilim Takipsilim says:

    Victorian fun from behind closed doors The anonymous author doesn't flinch in details that would eual a good issue of Hustler and proves that sex doesn't change only the clothes people undress Whether fact fiction or both as history and erotica this book is essential and once read will stay with you for life


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